This past weekend was the annual California Mathematics Council Southern Conference held in Palm Springs, CA.  It’s one of my favorite weekends of the year. Brilliant educators from all over the country converge to share strategies and inspiration with one another.  It’s an opportunity to connect with colleagues and discuss math – all the time.

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Imagine my surprise when I discovered he would be joining us for lunch on Saturday afternoon.  We have a mutual friend and I tried to contain my inner fan girl when we walked to the restaurant together.

John and I had an opportunity to connect as we waited for our friends to arrive for lunch.  We started off with some small talk about how we were enjoying the conference and what we were going to order for lunch.  He acknowledged that I had presented at the conference the day before and John’s next sentence began like this,

“Now that you [Patricia] have a seat at the table…”

…and I honestly don’t remember the end of this sentence because I think I blacked out a little…

I have a seat at the table?  I…have a seat at THE TABLE?

You see, I’ve been a teacher for 14 years and I have attended this conference almost every year for the last 12 years but this was the first time that I was brave enough to be a speaker.  I had the privilege of co-presenting a session with Matt Vaudrey (yes, theeeeeee Matt Vaudrey).  It was an amazing experience and it was affirming to get some positive feedback from several teachers that stayed after to ask questions and say such nice things.  

I shared with John that there’s a constant battle in my head when it comes to me sharing anything I’ve done in my classroom in a public forum.  On one shoulder there’s a little guy telling me that what I’m doing is awesome and I should share it with others and on the other shoulder there’s a different little guy telling me, “this is old news, everyone knows [insert whatever cool thing I’m doing here] so don’t embarrass yourself by thinking you have something to contribute.”  

John quickly stopped me, with a chuckle of disbelief at my statement, and reminded me that there is such a thing as “imposter syndrome,” and that I just needed to get over that because it’s holding me back.  John helped me to realize that it’s not always about sharing something new; it’s also just as valuable for teachers to hear how we’ve taken something we’ve learned and made it our own.

Y’all, this guy is the real deal.  He went on to share with me that he’s experienced times when he thought he had nothing else to share even after co-writing The Classroom Chef and writing Table Talk Math, the Would You Rather? site, and an extensive blog of really cool stuff.  I can’t thank him enough for the very real, humble, and encouraging conversation.  I really appreciated those few minutes with John and his affirmation that I have a seat at the table.  

I should also note that Matt Vaudrey has pulled up a chair for me at the table on more than one occasion and I’m blessed because of it:

I’m glad I finally sat down.

I realized during this conference that there are so many talented teachers doing great things in their classrooms that make a big difference in the lives of their students.  We need to hear from them too;  their voices, their stories, their strategies so that we can all be better.  

And yes, someone may have already said [insert whatever cool thing you’re doing here] before…but not in the way you’ll say it and not in the way you’ve done it and not at the time that you’ll share it with others.  

I’m saving a seat for you.

~PV